I have decided to move my house here. Yes, to Triceratan Island. And guess why--I couldn't help but be attracted by its wonderful smell. Yes, the smell--never noticed it before? You know, the instant I smelt it, I knew I was in love!
Oh, what does your island smell like, you ask? Why, it smells like the air-CORN starting up, of course, and I positively adore that scent! You should make a perfume with your island's air--take your bottles outdoors, cap them, and ship them off to other countries! Air-corn in a bottle! Awesome revenue source for the economy, you know.
Soooo...today was my first day as an official citizen of Triceratan Island. And guess what! The first thing you people did to me when I passed through your airport customs was GIVE ME A PAIR OF BEARS! A PEAR OF BAIRS! Can you believe that? The person stamped my passport--then some people jumped out of the scanning machine and just stuffed them into my arms and the bears started licking me and I dropped my only piece of luggage, which contains my entire house! Fragile, you know!
Well, it wasn't unwelcome. These are some lovely bears you've got. But the SHOCK! The SHOCK!
I think I'm going to enjoy myself here. Well, excellent welcome, my friends...now to get all this fur out of my shirt. I hope you have chickens and pigeons such as these
around here.
(Shall I require a signature? Well here be it:)
A B S O L M A S T E R
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